webponce rants

In today’s news, a student of my very own Wolverhampton university won a �30,000 payout after complaining that his course wasn’t good enough. The student, Mr Mike Austen was a 54 year old mature Law student, and complained that the course failed to live up to the ‘inflated’ picture it gave in the prospectus. Austen defending himself won an out of court settlement of a hefty sum - yet this creates somewhat of a paradox. If he is complaining that the course simply wasn’t up to scratch, yet he was sufficiently trained to the level to which he was able to win �30,000, I feel the University of Wolverhampton should sue for damages, that Mr Austen has quite adequatly proved that the course taught him well enough to win such a financially productive case.

Of course then, if he were to lose this case - he would have room to say that the university did not teach him well enough to fight back in defense, and the case would recurse ever on until space-time collapsed.

Good to see that people are spending their time making money out of educational institutions which have plenty of cash to just throw around in out of court settlements. Long live free education.

OMG!

29C/89F what is going on?!

still, can’t complain - it is July, and it is meant to be summer, but still, i mean.. come on! this is england!

where is the rain </tempt_fate>

whats that? kate who won what?

on the day that it is announced that scientists have been able to produce a map showing exactly where every object sits in space up to the orbit of jupiter (more here), how is it still possible that my travelcard goes missing every three days in a flat the relative size of less than a grain of sand? gah.

heh.. matthew knight gastrocritic

today:

+ woken up at some stupid hour when downstairs decide to do DIY at a crazy single figure AM hour

+ almost got knocked over by Claire Sweeney coming out of a newsagent

+ couldn’t find my Nike t-shirt

+ had to go to a client meeting

+ melted at work

*and* i’m on my period. ffs.

can i go home yet?

I feel deeply sorry for those little fold down chairs on the tube. They get a really raw deal.

During the daytime when the tubes are slightly less busy, no-one will sit on them until all of the other seats have been used. During the busiest periods, they can rubbed against by someone’s knees and suitcase. They’re close to the doors so in the winter they get cold and rained on in the outside cut and cover stations, and kicked and knocked into when a fat tourist can’t work out how to get on the tube.

i might start sitting on them a little more often, have a quick chat with them when i get on, see how they are getting on.

fold down chairs need love too.

“i’m hungry”

– me

“life is just one long series of surreal events”

– slim

i’m sure our landlord is not a vampire.

this is proved by the sheer number of mirrors in our flat. I just nipped around and did a rough estimate, and i counted 12.

TWELVE MIRRORS! there are only 5 rooms in the flat. i’m in the process of setting up a clever arrangement of the mirrors so i can see the telly in the front room whilst i brush my teeth, and if you open the bathroom cabinet, and shine a torch at the top right, i can annoy slim whilst he’s making tea in the kitchen.

simple pleasures, but then again - i am simple.

We’re coming to you live from the house - and PJ has just left.

Never really liked him anyway - and it leaves an extra bed for us to jump on.

Slim is home from his holiday - but managed to leave his keys in the countryside, so i met him in the pub, and there is a “matthewbird” behind the bar. I want to go back for last orders, but we have to wait for Davina to come let us out. Its a pain really. I think i’ll tidy my room instead then.

Woo!

Sasha loves the site!!

See, that is what is called a ‘personal seal of approval’.. and its what makes this whole ‘working 30 hour days’ ‘working until 3am’ ‘working on sites where you need to learn new languages’… its all good :)

of course i’ve now dropped into sydney time. i’m awake at night (hence, i just woke up, and i’m working now) and asleep in the day.

still, can’t complain too much.. eating food, working from home, watching bridget jones.. life is good :)

for the first time in three years, a planned tube strike is going to have an effect on me!

i won’t be able to get into work!

oh the horror ;)

http://www.itv.com/news/Front1217051.html

I’m concerned with the state of the UK music charts.

It seems to be a little underage…

What with acts like Kaci, Omero Mumba, S Club Under 12’s, Embryonic Attack, The Sperm Massive and Glint in the Milkman’s Eye - is anyone in the top ten able to make the most of their new found fame?

For a start, I doubt they would be allowed to open a bank account with decent interest rates without the signatory influence of a parent - yet alone reach the counter in the bank to deposit the money.. hell, they probably can’t even add up how much they earn or write joined up yet.

Where is the fun in being an underage rock and roll star? You can’t booze, drive, do drugs or rampant sex orgies, you’d be stuck at nursery supping on a milk on the carpet whilst teacher tells you stories.

Then on the other hand, with news that Rod Stewart can’t keep up with his twice daily chores, age doesn’t give you all that many benefits either.

i’m currently heading towards peterborough.

this immediatly poses me with two problems - first of all, i have no idea where peterborough is, and secondly, i’m meant to be on my way to london. I’m assured by various British Rail type staff that this is the quickest way to get to London on a Sunday evening from Nottingham - despite the direct services advertised, actually need to travel to London via Peterborough or Nuneaton. I’d not been to either cities before, so I opted for the former, and after passing through Grantham (which i believe is in Lincolnshire) we’re ’speeding’ towards Peterborough at a velocity Stephen Hawking would not have a hard time exceeding, without support from any of his theories of compression of time or wormholes. i’m currently praying to the god of transport - and he has decided to give me a sign in the way of four spanish tourists who also do not have that great awareness of their current location within the United Kingdom.

Well, at least if we do all get lost together, we could set up a refugee commune and swap cultural influences, and/or beer.

Today on the tube:

I slept.

Today on the tube:

Sat next to a smaller version of Yasmine Bleeth. She sneezed three times than sniffled into a hankercheif before i had a chance to whip out my pack of handy pocket sized tissues and offer her one (a tissue). I held back from shouting at her when she got off at Old Street - “Run Yasmine! Run!”

Today on the tube:

Three generations of american tourists, mother, grandmother and daughter, all enjoying a hot cup of starbucks apiece - with a horrified onlooker staring at the little girl in disbelief of her caffeine intake - and i mean staring, and horrified. i thought he was about to punch the mother for giving her child the cup.